- Unsettled Newsletter
- Posts
- Stop letting comparison steal your joy.
Stop letting comparison steal your joy.
How to break free from the comparison trap and focus on your own growth.
Faith Foushee
August 16, 2024
You’re sitting at home on your phone. Open Instagram. Everyone is having fun with their friends.
You close the app.
Open TikTok. Everyone is traveling and making $10K a day.
Close the app.
Open LinkedIn. Everyone is getting promoted or starting a business.
Close the app and throw your phone across the room.
The pity party begins.
In a world of social media, falling into the trap of comparison can happen daily.
If you let it.
Instead of letting comparison steal your joy, use it to push you further.
How? Keep reading.
The grass is greener where you water it.
Comparison is a barrier to making change and pursuing your dreams (keeping you in the egg phase). It’s so easy these days to hop online and find the perfect person who makes us feel bad about ourselves.
Instead of letting the grass be greener on the other side, focus on watering yours.
If there’s a change you want to make or are in the process of, keep pushing. Find the things that make you feel most confident and spend more time pursuing your goals.
How much time have you wasted comparing yourself to others? Redirect that energy towards your own journey.
Shifting your comparison mindset
Social comparison happens in two ways: upward or downward. We either compare to those we perceive as less than or better than us to inflate our ego or feel down on ourselves.
To shift your mindset, you have to recognize the thought when you have it. Then, reframe in a way that supports your goals.
Here are some examples:
Comparison: Atleast I’m doing better than that person.
Mindset shift: I don’t know the whole story, maybe that’s exactly where they want to be. I choose to find comfort in my growth and path rather than someone else's struggles.
Comparison: They got promoted before me, I must not be good enough.
Mindset shift: It’s awesome they got promoted. I don’t need to feel pressure because we’re not on the same path. I am focused on developing skills and experience towards my goals.
Comparison: They’ve already moved on to a new chapter in life, while I’m still stuck.
Mindset shift: It’s awesome they are doing that. Its so beautiful how we get to move at our own pace and timelines.
Comparison: They always seem so confident, why can’t I be like that?
Mindset shift: Confidence doesn’t happen overnight. I know my strengths and taking steps to build my self-confidence.
If you have a thought you need help reframing, respond “mindset shift” to this email and we’ll work on it together. Sometimes watering your grass is a two-person job :)
What you see daily on social media is curated. Someone had to decide if it was worth posting or not. You’re not getting the whole story in one post, picture, or video.
The person you’re comparing yourself to is comparing themselves to someone else. It may even be you.
Instead of comparing yourself to a reality that doesn’t exist, focus on your journey.
You have a goal. You have a change you want to make in your life.
Stay focused and keep going.
Your path is your own. Every step forward, no matter how small, is a victory. You’re exactly where you need to be.
The need to compare dissolves over time.
The goal you have is possible. The more you focus on watering your grass, the less you fall into a comparison trap. The true measure of success is how far you’ve come, not how you stack up against others.
Challenge: The next time you find yourself comparing to someone else. Ask this question:
"What can I do today to move closer to my own goals, rather than getting lost in what others are doing?"
You got this.
Comparison may be the thief of joy, but you hold the key to your own happiness. Keep watering your grass, you never know what could happen.
Tell bad vibes to kick rocks,
Faith Foushee 🤸
Reply